Well, That’s a No-Brainer

[[D E A L S]] * Wasn’t it just the other day that I was lamenting the increasing number of old TV shows now spawning big-screen movies? Sigh ... Now comes word that 25-year-old singer-actress Jessica Simpson has signed to co-star in a theatrical resurrection of the 1989-2001 beach series Baywatch. She’ll apparently be taking over the role of Casey Jean “C.J.” Parker, played on the tube by Pamela Anderson. According to Britain’s The Sun newspaper, it was Simpson’s rather unique skill at filling out hot pants, cowboy boots, and a pink bikini in last year’s Dukes of Hazzard movie that won the Texas-born blonde bombshell the chance to slip into Anderson’s red swimsuit. It won’t be a difficult fit; The Sun reports that while Simpson is a few inches shorter than Anderson (5 feet 3 inches tall, as opposed to Pamela’s 5-foot-7-inch stature), Jessica’s 34D bra size (Anderson wore a 34EE) should be perfectly acceptable to the predominately male audience for the Babewatch ... er, Baywatch remake. Harder might be the task of teaching the curvaceous Ms. Simpson what she needs to know about marine life (no, Chicken of Sea is not chicken), prior to her diving into the part of a Los Angeles County lifeguard.

A source tells The Sun that Simpson was “the unanimous choice for the Baywatch role,” and that having her on board might seal the deal for 53-year-old David Hasselhoff to return as Lieutenant Mitch Buchannon in the movie (oh, whoopee). Baywatch is expected to reach theaters later this year.